The honeymoon is over ...

I'm so glad this week is finally over. By about Tuesday, I was ready just to lock myself in a closet and wait out the rest of the week, but sometimes getting back in the saddle is the thing to do to get past whatever's bothering you. And many things decided to bother me this week ... :)

Monday started OK. My research methods class was first - it is probably my favourite class because we get help developing our thesis, but I have trouble with the class discussion groups. The class is pretty packed, and with that amount of people talking at once, I can't understand anything that is being said. I was in a group with 3 other people, and a few of them were giving me pointers on my thesis subject. I was grateful for the help, for sure. One of the girls told me that I should ask the teacher about something in my topic, and I agreed that that would be a good idea - even though I really wasn't sure what she was wanting me to ask the teacher about; it was just easier to agree with her than to constantly keep asking, "What did you say?" "Could you repeat that?" every two minutes (noise problem, not a language problem). Then, lucky me, the teacher came around, and my new friend, trying to be helpful, told him, "Kristen has a question for you." He looked me straight in the eye, and I panicked - not only did I not want to ask him a question in front of so many people, but I had no idea what question she was wanting me to ask him. I told them it was OK and that I would talk to him later, but I must have come off looking like quite the weirdo. I got pretty flustered after that, but instead of being able to leave class and go de-tox in my room, I had to straight to my next class where I was supposed to do a 10-minute oral presentation on ... I can't even remember now, it's been that kind of week. ha. Anyway, that went surprisingly better than I thought, except that I had to do it in front of the guest speaker the teacher invited to our class that day. I still have no idea how I did (as far as a mark) because that teacher says very little, and mostly just lets us take over debate in that class. That worries me. Our oral participation in debates in that class is worth 30% of our final mark - being quick on my toes is definitely not a gift of mine, so that is a constant stress for me every Monday as well. Our teacher is also the program director who decides if we graduate or not - I wish he would just react to my work every once in a while so I know where I stand. Anyway, I went home after 6 straight hours of class, thinking the worst part of the week was over.

Tuesday morning, I got a phone call on my dorm phone telling me that (what I thought was) the Registrar's office had something for me to pick up, and that I should just ask the person at the front desk for an envelope from the "Bee-cee Meeneestree of Ejookayshee-on" - that should have been my first clue that a language kerfuffle lie ahead. I have found that many people in the Registrar's office can't read English, and this has majorly complicated my BC Student Loans application - I still have received no funding because of mistakes at Laval, but more on that later. Anyway, I went to the Registrar, waited in line, and asked the lady at the front desk about my envelope. She had no idea what I was talking about and was unnecessarily rude to me. Fine, whatever. I asked her if she could guess where that phone call this morning came from (since, evidently, it wasn't them), and she was quite sure that the Political Science Department had what I needed. I walked over to that building, and eventually found the right person to talk to. I retold her the whole story of where I had been this morning, and she had no idea what I was talking about. I asked her if she could guess maybe who ELSE may have called me about that. She thought maybe it was the Financial Aid Department. So, discouraged even more, I headed clear across campus to Financial Aid. I waited in line and re-retold my tale to the lady at the front counter. By this time, I am pretty stressed out and nervous, so not only is my French deteriorating, but I start to stutter a lot through it. She, too was quite rude as well and had no idea what I was talking about. She told me that I should go to the Registrar's office. She clearly was not listening to me. I said, "I went to the Reigistrar. She sent me to the Poli Sci Dept. She sent me here. Is there a FOURTH place you think I may have gotten this call from?" By this time, I am practically crying. Some kind soul behind her took a little pity on me and took me aside to call around to see what he could find. He wasn't able to find anything, but he tried to comfort me by saying, "Well, I guess if it was really important, whoever called you will call you back." I laughed a little, thanked him for his help, then went to the washroom to have a little meltdown. I walked back to my dorm room and saw a huge red puddle under my fridge. I opened the door, and everything had melted, including the strawberries I had frozen in little Glad containers. My fridge must have come unplugged yesterday somehow, and now everything smelled funny. Another meltdown on my bed. I had to throw everything out, and all I had was a small can of beans for dinner.

Long story short, I called BC Student Loans (for the relief of being able to talk out my problem in English), and they told me that Laval had somehow messed up on my paperwork, and that I should take the loan form in myself, have the Registrar stamp it, then fax it to Student Loans on my own. I agreed to do that Friday. I went back to the Registrar (which closes for 1.5 hours at lunch), and just made it in the door before they locked up. I gave her the form and asked her to stamp it for me so I could fax it in and get my long-overdue Student Loan money. She took it, and told me she would fax it off in 3-5 business days. Completely exasperated, I gave her my best, "Are you kidding?" look, but knowing that she would do nothing to speed it up, I thanked her and left. I know this is no one person's fault, but maybe the 'administration' doesn't realize that while all my paperwork is being delayed, I am feeling hungry (for not having my loan money, and for losing everything in my fridge), that I can't pay rent on Sunday, or my phone bill, etc. I get that there are always procedures to follow, but I have been in Quebec more than a month - I really thought I would have money by now. Fortunately, the "Bank of Dad" has come to my rescue and offered to lend me what I need to get by. I am so grateful for that, but frustrated that my financial woes have spilled over onto my parents' shoulders. It looks like I SHOULD have my loan in order by about October 15th, and in November, I can start this whole process over again for the Winter Semester loan. Sigh.

Well, all is not lost. This is getting long, so I'll keep it brief. Even with my Student Loan, I still need some extra money to get through the semester, so I decided to get a job. I was hired this week at "l'École des Langues de l'Estrie" - an ESL school that works mostly with French-speaking public servants and business people who need to learn English for work or who need to pass a public servants' language exam for a new job. I was hesitant to get back into teaching, but so far, this is what I have found for work so I will teach until something more political comes up. I'm grateful for the job, and hopefully, they will have a contract for me soon. I am hoping that somehow, in teaching public servants English, I will meet people who will be looking to hire at their government office, and since they will know me already from English school ... who knows? Maybe this is the Lord's roundabout way of getting me my dream job, whatever that might be. At this point, I would be satisfied with a positive income instead of constant loans from so many people. God does provide, though, even in this way, so I should be grateful. When I finish school, I would really like to financially help out others who struggle with funding school - it's just so crazy to worry about money when school has so many stresses of its own.

Anyway, speaking of school, I have lots of work to do, so I better go. My French friend and I are leading a 3-hour class discussion on Monday (in that same class) on the legitimate use of violence by the state. Yeah, I don't know what that means either, but whatever. We'll put on a good show. :) Miss you all.

KNL